Lately I have not been eating well due to negligence and lack of initiative on my part. “I don’t care eat I eat so as long as I do eat” has been my mantra over the past few weeks and that has stop. Hence, I hope to eat a healthier, more well-balanced diet.
In addition, I used to exercise on a near-daily basis every day for most of the summer but apathy put a halt to that for the mast month. My body has felt heavier and my mobility has been encumbered by excess fat. Therefore, I aim to return to my regular exercise routine in conjunction with dieting.
I have been reverting to an old fault that had plagued me during my darkest days years ago and that was of losing my temper due to trivialities. On Saturday, for instance, I went nuts since I dropped a bit of food and it slightly stained my shirt. Last weekend I drove my brothers up the wall since they did not make a semi-important phone call that was not as urgent as my anger suggested.
Along with not altering myself over little things it is imperative that I find appropriate avenues I which to vent my frustration. Tonight I argued with “the flea” over his irresponsibility balancing work with his social life and my mom and other brother yelled at me to “calm down” almost as much as I was screaming at him. This is the fault that will be the most tricky to solve. However I cannot continue to hold in my emotions despite giving a veneer of calmness.
For as long as I can remember one of my Achilles heels is that I revert far too often to sarcasm as a tool for defense and attack in conversations. At times it can be done jokingly but ore often that not I interject sarcasm to hurt and injure others. The negative use of sarcasm is something I need to let go of.
Moreover, my glass tends to be half-empty rather than half-full. Such an outlook is not inherently bad except when it leads to an excess of complaining, bitching, nit-picking, and malaise. This is what is going on with me and I didn’t realize it until a few other days ago when an acquaintance confided to me. At the time it was a shocking revelation though in retrospect it was something that I should have figured out on my own. Better late than never, perhaps?
Apart from chatting once in a while with friends and the occasional e-mail my social life is nonexistent. I had hoped to change that over the summer but that has yet to come about. Hopefully I can drag out one of my friends to catch a film with me on Tuesday night though I need to make a more concerted effort to keep in touch with those that were and continue to be close to me.
I need to go out more often. It’s as simple as that. Of the nine summer concerts I had hoped to attend I eventually ended up going to none! (The reasons why will be examined in a separate post). Yes it’s good that I stay at home to take care of my responsibilities but there’s more to that. Going out is something I must take advantage of especially before the winter weather makes things too difficult.
Much like I’m smart for certain things I need to wise up in other which is why I’m glad that I can acknowledge my faults.
Now the heard part comes in: executing the changes that need to be done and sticking to them.