Saturday, April 29, 2006

Live Blogging: Red Bulls @ Chivas USA

10.00pm - After last Saturday’s ass whipping I don’t know why the hell I’m going to live blog this evening’s game between the visiting Red Bulls (a.k.a. “we” or “us”) against Chivas USA (a.k.a. “goatfuckers”. I’ll explain why this name later), much less watch the game. But I still have some faith left so I will masochistically follow the game tonight.

Inasmuch as another front office official left earlier this week, coach Mo Johnston continues at the helm of our boys. In terms of players, there are a few setbacks such as the absence of Abbe Ibrahim due to visa issues, Jean Phillipe Peguero in order to attend a wedding, and Mike Magee to undergo surgery from the finger he seriously injured in last week’s loss. Amado Guevara claims that he will be back to his original, MVP form this week and he sure as hell better be. Furthermore, this game will be our first regular season match against ex-coach Bob Bradley since he was replaced by Johnston late last season and was hired by the goatfuckers.

Meanwhile, the goatfuckers are also suffering from some setbacks as most of their midfield is injured and they traded away veteran defender Ezra Hendrickson.

My somewhat uneducated prediction- all-in-all another dull affair. Guevera will score from a set piece and we will not blow the lead. 1-0 us.

Okay, let's hope for the best (and expect the worst).

10.02pm- MSG's pre-game just showed a set of Ante Razov's goals this season with the goatfuckers. I sense a bad omen.

10.08pm- The whistle's blown to start the game. We start in a 4-4-2 formation, unlike the 3 defenders we had last week. Almost forgot, this is the first game at the goatfuckers since we beat them 1-0 to qualify into the '05 playoffs.

10.10- Guevara floats a free kick that's easily captured by their goalie. So far my prediction's not coming true.

10.12- 5 minutes in and I'm already yelling at the TV as Buddle mishandles a stellar pass from our midfield.

10.14- MSG says that Peguero's absence is due to his sister's wedding. Congrats.

10.20- 13 minutes in; scoreless. Solid defense and very fluid movment between the midfielders and fowards. We just escaped a dangerous chance against us. Otherwise not bad so far.

10.26- We have to be careful with our offside trap as they've been caught 4 times in the first 17 minutes. Guevara looks much better and just took a shot on goal but has yet to have a strong impact so far. We look a lot stronger than last week.

10.29- Alert stop by Big Fat Tony (BFT) on a grazing center by the goatfuckers. Our counterattack almost worked with a stellar pass from Guevara spoiled on a tight angle by Buddle.

10.35- Jeebus! Mendoza just choked on an easy wide open opportunity from 3 yards out after a stellar center by Palencia. Then our grazing center into the box was missed by two marked layers. The goatfucker's counter and nearly score on a dangerous play. Finally some excitement to a tactical, albeit dull match.

10.36- Jeebus again! BFT saves a floater by Razov. Our defense is now swiss cheeze and rather fortunate we're still scoreless.

10.41- The goatfuckers' Paco Palencia's the highest paid player in MLS: $1.3 million. Guevera's not even in the top 5 of salaries. Fair or not? Hmmmm...

10.45- Oh jeez, Buddle's injured. The trainer's out to attend him. Seems like he's pulled his left hamstring, which has been a recurring problem throughout his career. Looks like he'll be subbed out the game. Not good at all.

10.49- Goatfuckers scrum in front of our goal but we clear it before they score. With 5 minutes left in the half it's still scoreless.
Buddle returns to the pitch but only lasts about 3 minutes before Magee and his injured finger comes into replace him.

10.56- Halftime. The situation with Buddle does not look promising, especially with such a depleted bench. One has to hope that his injury will not extend into our next game in 2 weeks. (May 13 in Jersey against lowly Chicago). Defense was somewhat leaky in the last 20 minutes and gave them extra space to move. Midfield is okay but needs to do a better job distributing to the fowards. Guevera's improved and has had more of a presence than last week. All-in-all, an average effort though the team will have to step up a bit in the next half.

11.27- Just returned from showering. 56th minute and still scoreless. Each team showing more strength on offense, and the game is more fluid and exciting.

Ok, so why do call Chivas USA the “goatfuckers?” Several clubs from Latin American nations played in a tournament the Copa Merconorte which took place from 1998 to 2001. In the 2001 edition, some MLS teams were invited to it including our team, then known as the MetroStars. Mexican club Chivas de Guadalajara (owners of Chivas USA) were supposed to come to the Meadowlands and play a group match against us approximately one month after 9/11 occurred. Citing “safety concerns” Chivas did not fly to the terrorist haven of East Rutherford, New Jersey and forfeited the match. Mind you, Guadalajara is not exactly known as the Garden of Eden against crime. Still, this act of unabashed cowardice led to their expulsion from the tournament. We fared slightly better though we got eliminated by eventual champions Millionarios from Colombia. That incident, coupled with the fact that Santa Fe got humiliated a few nights ago by Chivas in the Copa Libertadores, is why I kindly refer to Chivas USA as the “goatfuckers”.

11.35- Dangerous chance in the 67th minute by the goatfuckers as BFT does well to cut the angle on the shot. We've shown more order throughout the game and a far better output than last week. The defense has been strongly tested over the past few minutes, however.

11.44- 13 minutes left. Defense is allowing a little too much room for the goatfuckers to roam. Their ccounterattack has been good, yet enough to break the deadlock. We've had few offensive chances, but they've been good.

11.49- Djorkaeff just took a free kick and slmmed it into their wall. Neither side has taken advantage of free kick opportunities. Meanwhile, the offside flag is raised for the umpteenth time against the goatfuckers.

11.53- 4 minutes left. By the way, remember the spitting celebration by Eskandarian against us last week? MLS brass decided to fine him the princely sum of $250 for his antics. His goal celebration was touted on the league website almost all week and it provided more publicity to the league, but business is business no?

11.57- 2 minutes of injury time indicated by the ref.

11.59- Game over. 0-0 tie with the goatfuckers. Average effort all-around. It's a soccer axiom that a tie on the road is as valuable as a win at home, but the end result feels hollow due to the way the season has been. Next game's against Chicago at the swamp in 2 weeks.

Fuck this, I'm off to bed and watching the "TV Funhouse" special on SNL.

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