Thursday, February 01, 2007

The Palmero Diaries, part two

Lovely angled shot of La Palma’s main church (via this site)

As promised here is the second and (unfortunately) final part of the “Palmero Diaries” which I wrote about a month ago in the small town of La Palma, Colombia. Much like the first part I will include a few afterthoughts in italics.

Wednesday January 03, 2007

For the first time in a long time I am at peace with myself. I guess this country life is the ideal nourishment for the soul. That and my visit to dad’s grave on New Year’s Eve helped calm most of my internal anxieties. [For the rest of the time I was in La Palma I was serene and not stressed. Except for the bout with dengue around the middle of the month].

Speaking of New Year’s Eve, it was a grand night where I danced and got plastered. (Not that I’m proud to have consumed over 2/3 bottle of aguardiente [more like ¾] but I was pleased that I was able to tolerate such an amount). Yet by far the best part of the evening was receiving a surprise visit from the husband of one of my aunts. (She the one who threatened to assault my mom on several occasions claims retardedly [bad grammar, I know] that “those gimps (being my brothers and I) killed my brother”). He sat and talked with us in private and expressed how much he cared for us. He wished us the best and tried to apologize for the disgusting slurs and threats by his wife and sisters-in-law. Though we appreciated his thoughtful words we told him that what his wife and sisters-in-law did was unforgivable. Though I’m prone to provide second chances I doubt I ever will for them. It would be very selfish to claim that they killed dad, yet their negative influence and lack of compassion seriously damaged a frail psyche. I can’t say that I feel angry against them because doing so wouldn’t help me or bring dad magically back to life. In reality I pity them for their ignorance and idiocy though ultimately I could care less how they conduct their lives as long as they leave my immediate family and me alone. [They’ve resorted to saying junk behind our backs which on the one hand is cowardly since they ought to just come to us and say it. On the other hand, they are making fools of themselves through their backstabbing and that gives me some slight comfort.]

My stay in La Palma has gone past the halfway point yet I feel like it will finish in days. [I felt time move faster though things had the tendency to be laid back there. Too much relaxation, perhaps?] Little-by-little, cousins aunts, and uncles are leaving as they return to their daily lives and routines. (One cousin and his girlfriend leave for Bogota in less than a half-hour, for example). Though I look forward to the 15th when my immediate family leaves for Bogota I know in my heart that I will really miss this quiet oasis of a village, especially my “grandma.” [I still do. A lot]. And now I will depart to the dining room table where a piping hot and meaty tamale is waiting for me. [Tamale + cup of hot chocolate = sheer bliss].

“It’s very good my friend!” (Inside joke).

So I’m afraid that’s it in terms of my journal entries over the month I was in La Palma. What had originally been a grand idea to write in a notebook every day turned out to be a lame two entries. I guess I better redeem myself ASAP. Hopefully I’ll have some photos I took posted during the weekend.